Leading Worship vs. Performing

Leading Worship vs. Performing

The World is Not a Stage

Be especially careful when you are trying to be good so that you don't make a performance out of it.  It might be good theater, but the God who made you won't be applauding.  "When you do something for someone else, don't call attention to yourself.  You've seen them in action, I'm sure - 'playacotrs' I call them - treating prayer meeting and street corner alike as a stage, acting compassionate as long as someone is watching, playing to the crowds.  They get applause, true, but that's all they get.  When you help someone out, don't think about how it looks.  Just do it - quietly and unobtrusively.  That is the way your God, who conceived you in love, working behind the scenes, helps you out. ~Matthew 6:1-4

You've probably seen this: you're trying out new churches or visiting a friends church (or maybe this is even your own church) and the service begins with a rock show.  Guitars are shredding, drums are jammin, people are jumping up and down, hands are raised, tears are flowing, smoke is billowing across the stage......the only thing missing is the pyrotechnics......oh yeah, and God. 

Music is a huge part of the Christian culture these days.  There are hundred's of thousands of Christian Musicians, there are Christian music labels and recording studios.  If your church doesn't have a rock type worship band then you're church is out of date.  The days of the organ lady piping out hymns is over and when was the last time you saw a hymnal? 

Of course with this change in the music scene, a new thing has been created - The Christian Music Performer.  I've been to a few concerts where the performers are Christians but the concert is not really any different than a typical rock show (of course maybe minus the beer garden). God wants us to spread the gospel and I know that the more famous you are the more people you reach, so if Swiftfoot or any other crossover Christian band, can stay true to their Christian morals and appeal to the Christian AND secular crowds, then go for it.  But when it comes to your basic worship team in church, we need to remember, this is not a performance, this is all about worshiping the One True and Living God and leading the congregation to the throne for 15 minutes or so.

A great example of how a worship team can make a worship service a performance is this youtube clip - enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJp98hoqy5I - wrong worship

Yes, there is humor in this video but it makes me more sad then it does happy.  Worship should always be about God. Period.  But our human nature loves to make it about us, even if it's just a little bit.

Here are the questions that I handed out to the youth band.

When we mock something, it's usually only funny if there is some abount of "truth" in it.  This video is unfortunately funny for that exact reason - while we may think, "I would never act that way or think that way", there are many who look to the Sunday morning worship as a way to cast the spotlight on themselves.

1. We are on a stage, we do have mics and instruments, and there is an audience, so how do we NOT perform?
2. We rehearse, we try to perfect, we make changes to make it sound better, we think about the musicality of the song in order to what? Why do all that just to lead others in worship?
3. For you, what makes it a worshipful experience? Where is your mind when you are leading?
4. When is it "leading" and when it it "look at me"?
5. What about things like raising your hands, closing your eyes - if you don't do these things when you aren't leading, is it OK to do them when you are leading?

He Took on the Status of a Slave
If you've gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care - then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends.  Don't push your way to the front; don't sweet-talk your way to the top.  Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead.  Don't be obsessed with getting your own advantage.  Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand. ~Philippians 2:1-4

The bottom line is this, God know your heart at all times, everyone else watches your actions on and off stage, if we are humble and lift others up ALWAYS, then it doesn't have to be an act on the worship platform - it is who your are.

    6.  How can we pray for you tonight?

Personal reflection:
In Matthew 18:20 it states, "For where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them. "Will the Holy Spirit be a part of our worship every time we are on stage (and off)?

If you have ever worked with teenagers, they are special - I mean this in a good way, really I do, but they tend to be self focused so one other thing that I have done in order to get them to focus on God rather than how amazing their music skills are, is the name our youth band - Equal Ground. It is very easy to elevate ourselves to be above others when we have a speciality and so I bring up on a regular basis that we are not any better than the other youth group kids that come to worship with us and we are no better than the kids at school that we know don't attend church or don't have the same morals as us.......I think this is a concept that most understand - but it's not in the understanding, it's in the application, which is always a work in progress no matter what they age.

Finding a song that would drive the point home further was a bit challenging because I wanted something that again reflects that this life we lead, is not our own if we've given it over to Jesus and it's in giving our lives fully to Him that we take the spotlight off of ourselves and on to Him.  I picked Jimmy Needhams song - Yours to Take because if we come to practice and to worship with that attitude - "not my will, but Yours be done", we can fix a lot of the human nature issues and come before the cross with a servants attitude.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enSkoZALQ2k - Yours to Take by Jimmy Needham

The Christian Musician's Ego

So, then, if with Christ you've put all that pretentious and infantile religion behind you, why do you let yourselves be bullied by it? "Don't touch this! Don't taste that! Don't go near this!" Do you think things that are here today and gone tomorrow are worth that kind of attention? Such things sound impressive if said in a deep enough voice. They even give the illusion of being pious and humble and ascetic. But they're just another way of showing off, making yourselves look important. ~ Colossians 2:23 (The Message)

 The Christian Musician's Ego

So it's foolish for us to think that because we are Christian's we don't have an ego.  I think the main difference between a secular musician and a Christian musician is that the Christian has (or should have) a more heightened sense of how our ego will affect the goal of our music.  We are still musicians and many of the Christian musician's I know  are extremely talented.  But in the worship setting, we aren't playing and singing to show off our talents, we are playing and singing to lead the congregation into worship with the Lord.  So, many times, we walk a fine line.

I believe that as Christian's with a musical talent that we use on a stage, that we do need to be confident.  And many times, confidence can be seen as ego.  So in this lesson, we spent a great deal defining ego and confidence and how we can use the musical gifts we've been given to share the love, grace and mercy of God.

This is the story I shared with them in order to make a point about confidence and the importance of being a confident but not a conceited Christian musician:

Several years ago I was having a great time as a Christian musician; I was singing in the choir, I was being recognized by getting solo's, I was even voted soloist of the year by my peers, I was writing music and just felt great about myself as a musician and that had not always been the case.  College had been rough for me as a musician and I never felt that I was ever as good or as accomplished as many of the other music majors so this was a wonderful time for me and I was on top of the world.  I would like to think that I was down to earth at the same time but when I fell, it was a pretty long way down.

Like I stated, I was writing music.  Songs inspired by a loving God I was sure.  So when I heard about a record company that was going to a a workshop here in my area and they were looking for singers and songwriters, I thought - here it is, my chance to really shine for God!  I had 3 songs that I submitted and was really confident about 2 but was sure that at least 1 would be an instant hit.  The day of the workshop arrived and I was excited, I had day dreamed about the praise and recognition I would receive for my amazing songs!  I picked up my packet and headed off to the workshop.  I opened the envelop and what was in front of me was devastating.  He strongly disliked my songs.  "Awkward, Not Unique, Not So Strong, Meandering, amongst other not so flattering comments that were all over my lyric pages and his comment sheets.  I was deflated and hurt.  That was 12 years ago and even though I've tried a time or two to write something since - I haven't.  My confidence in the world of writing music is gone and I don't if it will ever return.

My point with this story is, we need to have some degree of confidence to be on a worship team.  If we don't believe in ourselves to some point, we will be more of a distraction on stage and a hindrance to bringing the congregation before the throne.   So our job becomes a balancing act - be confident but not egotistic, and learn to recognize when ego starts to take over and bring ourselves back in check.  It's not about us but we are the vessels being used - tricky stuff.

Here are the questions I asked the group.

The Importance of being confident but not conceited

We all have egos to some point.  While I would agree that being overly egotistical, in other words, you are your biggest fan; is not a welcome behavior in Christian music, I think confidence and self-assurance have a respectful place among Christian artists.

1.      We need to find the balance between feeling confident enough to stand on stage in front of our peers and not be thinking so much of ourselves that we kick God off the stage.

a.      How do we find that balance?

b.      How do we keep ourselves from becoming divas or taking center stage?

c.       How will we know when we’ve crossed the line between it being about God and being about us?

d.      Are we mature enough to be called out when others see this line being crossed?

Night Lights by Jimmy Needham

Be Thou exalted over my reputation
'Cause applause is a poor form of soul medication

And I've tried it for years but my symptoms remain
Still fretting the day that they'll misplace my name
Still selling my soul for American fame
Treating the promotion of Jesus like a well-oiled machine
Advancing His kingdom just to snag some acclaim

Now, I'm both comforted and haunted that it isn't just me though
I see a nation of people needing to feed their own egos
Parading status like steeples
Do we not know it's evil to love ourselves
More than both God and His people?

But see, here's where You turn this poem on its head
'Cause the greatest among us came as servant instead
And You humbled Yourself to the point of Your death
Apparently love for the Father's glory runs red

So friends, will we point to the Son till our own flames grow dim?
Will our bright lights become merely night-lights near Him?
Words echo once, let them echo again
Be Thou exalted over my reputation 

Think of yourselves the way Christ Jesus thought of himself. He had equal status with God but didn't think so much of himself that he had to cling to the advantages of that status no matter what. Not at all. When the time came, he set aside the privileges of deity and took on the status of a slave, became human! Having become human, he stayed human. It was an incredibly humbling process. He didn't claim special privileges. Instead, he lived a selfless, obedient life and then died a selfless, obedient death—and the worst kind of death at that—a crucifixion. ~Philippians 2:5-8

hum·ble

   [huhm-buh l, uhm-] adjective - not proud or arrogant; modest: to be humble although successful.

2.    We are rock stars to some degree – we are on stage, playing instruments, singing with microphones, engaging the “audience”…….    

a.     How do we stay humble?  How do we display humility? 

b.    Is it “Ok” to be flawed and still lead worship?

3.    How can we pray for you tonight?

Personal reflection:

Give credit where credit is due – God is the reason we are worshiping but are you being your true, worshipful self on and off stage? Are you different when people aren’t looking?

Jimmy Needham is a great but humble Christian Musician that I have become very inspired by, his poem is recited on his album Night Lights, which I would highly recommend. Check him out at http://www.jimmyneedham.com/music/

The songs that I used to demonstrate the humility that we should feel as Christians - and I mean humility because we are not worthy of the gifts that the Lord has given us yet, He continues to bless us even when we are at our worst - are I Need You To Love Me by Barlow Girl and Strong Enough by Matthew West. Two songs expressing a thankfulness that we are blessed and given the opportunity to live an eternity with Jesus even though we don't even come close to deserving it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ubFjn6PjUc&feature=related - I Need You to Love Me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8JsRxVczmQ - Strong Enough

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icaxX6JTmnA - Night Lights (Personal note, his reading of this, gives me chills)

So to bring it all together - we all have to have some degree of confidence and ego, but when we pair those things with humility and AWE for what God has done for us even though we don't deserve it, I think we can learn to balance our musical gifts and be the worship leaders that God is calling us to be.

Spiritual Gifts relating to music and worship

Spiritual Gifts relating to music and worship

1 Peter 4:10
Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms.

So when I started thinking about lesson 2 I thought about a class I took several years ago that helped you figure out what your spiritual gifts are.  I knew one of my gifts would be teaching and there were a few that I knew I didn't have; mercy, tongues, prophecy, etc.  but I felt compelled to know what my gifts were and how I could use my God given gifts to serve the Lord.

So now, my goal was to enlighten the kids to figure out and think about how they could use the gifts that they have been given to help them serve the worship team and the other kids in the youth group.

I started with sharing this story from my childhood:

When I was  young girl my mom hired the most beautiful woman to come work in our shop.  I was totally enamored with her, she had long blond wavy hair (it was the late 70's), she had beautifully painted long nails, she was so pretty and kind and I was in awe!  Well, one of my love languages is gift giving, so when I noticed the blackberry bushes on my street over flowing with berries, I thought that I would pick a bunch and give them to her.  I went to work with my mom, berries in hand, and so excited to give her my gift.  She was very gracious and I was very happy that my gift brought her happiness.  The next day, she came in with some small pies......blackberry pies....made with the blackberries that I had given her.....I was so sad, in my young mind I thought - she didn't like my gift and she's giving it back - I was heart broken.

I know now that was not the case at all, she probably also had the love language of gift giving and wanted to gift back and it made me think about how God gives us gifts.  He doesn't give us spiritual gifts so that we can take them home and keep them to ourselves, no He gives us gifts so that we can share them with the world and through our sharing, many will be blessed in the name of God. 

When we think of gifts we often think in terms of art or intelligence, i.e.  Mozart was musically gifted, Picasso was artistically gifted, Einstein was intellectually gifted – but when talking about spiritual gifts, there are no direct references to music, art or smarts.  This does not mean that we, as musicians, aren’t musically gifted because I believe that God has granted many musicians with talent, but how we use that talent is where our gifts lie. 

So here's what I want you to do. When you gather for worship, each one of you be prepared with something that will be useful for all: Sing a hymn, teach a lesson, tell a story, lead a prayer, provide an insight.  If prayers are offered in tongues, two or three's the limit, and then only if someone if present who can interpret what you're saying.  Otherwise, keep it between God and yourself.  And no more than two or three speakers at a meeting, with the rest of you listening and taking it to heart. Take your turn, no one person taking over.  Then each speaker gets a chance to say something special from God, and you all learn from each other.  If you choose to speak, you're also responsible for how and when you speak. When we worship the right way, God doesn't stir us up into confusion; He brings us into harmony.  The goes for all the churches-no exceptions.
1 Corinthians 14:26 (The Message)

Leadership, service, teaching

He handed out gifts above and below, filled heaven with his gifts, filled earth with his gifts.  He handed out gifts of apostle, prophet, evengelist, and pastor-teacher to train Christ's followers in skilled servant work, working within Christ's body, the church, until we're all moving rhythmically and easity with each other, efficient and graceful in response to God's Son, fully mature adults, fully developed within and without, fully alive like Christ. 

Ephesians 4:11-12

The spiritual gifts that we as worship leaders should possess are;

·         Leadership – we are leading people to Christ through our music, attitude and reverence

1.       Do you view yourself as a leader?

2.       Do others view you as a leader?

·         Service – we serve the congregation by genuinely worshiping God

1.       Has a worship service ever impacted you so much that you felt an immediate change in your heart for God?

2.       Has a worship service ever made you feel frustrated, angry or empty?

·         Teaching – we teach the non-musician that worship comes from the heart not from perfect pitch or guitar riffs.  We teach the congregation how to come before the throne.

1.       Modeling behavior is how we teach people to worship because they can’t see our hearts, how will they know to genuinely worship the Lord through music?  How is this taught?

2.       Have you ever heard the phrase, “Those that can, do.  Those that can’t, teach.”?  This implies that teaching is for the less talented, but aren’t teachers usually the ones that set us on the paths that lead us to our careers?

a.       Is there a teacher that has helped shape your life?

b.      Are you ready to help shape the lives of those around us for Christ?

1.       Knowing that our job as worship leaders is so important; does this excite you or scare you?

2.       How can we pray for you tonight?

Personal reflection: This question is just between you and God.
Are you someone with musical talent? Or are you someone who has musical talent, biblical
insight, and the desire to share these gifts for God's glory?

If you are interested in taking the test to find out what your spiritual gifts are go to http://www.kodachrome.org/spiritgiftyouth/

(I have not taken the test on this website but I looked it over and it looks like a pretty good one.  If anyone takes it, would you let me know how you liked it?)


Finding a worship song that fits this topic was a bit challenging but one in particular came to mind - Starfield's I Will Go.  Being the person who willingly says - "send me, I will go Lord send me".  Trusting and knowing that God will equipt you will all that you need in order to do His will, takes true faith, but going back to the first verse (1 Peter 4:10) states that God will do exactly that.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oo-hkHf_qeY&feature=related  (Starfields I Will Go)

The Heart of Worship

John 4:24 (The Message)
"It's who you are and the way you live that count before God.  Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of the truth.  That's the kind of people the Father is out looking for: those who are simply and honestly themselves before Him in their worship.  God is sheer being itself-Spirit.  Those who worship Him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration."

Year 1:
So when I took on the role of leading the youth worship, my initial goal was to have them do great worship music and have some prayer time.  That was about it, it worked fine.  We had some great sets and we had some OK sets but the group itself didn't seem to be truly meshing. In fact, there was a few times when there was definitely a divide amongst the group and an individual or two. Can you truly be worshiping God when the relationships here on this earth are causing stress and a division amongst your fellow brothers and sisters in Christ?

Year 2:
This year was going to be different; more organized, more prayer, more communication, less rehearsing - more bonding.  So this was how I addressed the lack of meshing.  We lead worship once a month and then the following rehearsal was all about bonding with the group - we had a movie night at my house, ice cream at DQ, game night, etc.  And I believe that as a group of people we did get along better but I still noticed a disconnect at prayer time - when asking for prayer requests things got very impersonal.  People would ask for prayer for doing well on a test or for a friend who is struggling but never anything very deep or personal (now remember I am working with high schoolers here) so my thought was this - they don't trust one another!  Can you truly worship God when you are standing beside a group of people you don't trust?

Year 3:
So I knew that I didn't want to approach this year with the same style and it struck me to go back to my roots as a teacher and make lesson plans for the first 8 rehearsals and focus on what WORSHIP is all about. I realized the music will only be amazing if our hearts our worshiping God.  We can be the best musicians ever but playing for ourselves or playing for the congregation is not what worship is about - we have to worship first and be musicians/friends/confidants 2nd.

The first lesson: The Heart of Worship





When Christians use the word "worship" today, we are most likely to think of 6 to 10 people up on stage playing rock music that praises Jesus while lifting our hands to the heavens. But here is what I found at Dictionary.com:

Wor-ship

        [wur-ship] - Reverent honor and homage paid to God or a sacred personage, or to any object regarded as sacred.

Hmmmm, so it doesn't say anything about guitars, drums, singing, mics, sound boards, etc.  So worship can be done through all sorts of acts: singing, dancing, meditating, genuflecting, etc.  OK, so our method of worship is going to be through music but where does true worship come from?

So I sat my crew down and handed out a paper with these questions.

1.       Why do we use music to worship God?

2.       Look at the words of these two “worship” songs –

a.        Are they appropriate for worship?

b.      What are these songs about? God? Me? Does it matter what the focus is on?

c.       Just because a song is written by a Christian, does it make it a good worship song?

 

1.       I can only imagine what it will be like, when I walk by Your side...
I can only imagine, what my eyes will see, when Your Face is before me!
I can only imagine. I can only imagine.
Surrounded by Your Glory, what will my heart feel?
Will I dance for you, Jesus? Or in awe of You, be still?
Will I stand in Your presence, or to my knees will I fall?
Will I sing 'Hallelujah!'? Will I be able to speak at all?
I can only imagine! I can only imagine!

I can only imagine, when that day comes, when I find myself standing in the Son!
I can only imagine, when all I will do, is forever, forever worship You!
I can only imagine! I can only imagine!
[ Lyrics from: ((http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/m/mercyme/i_can_only_imagine.html ]
(Written by Bart Millard of Mercy Me)

2.      You are God of every nation
You are Lord of all creation
You are King now more than ever
Lord, You reign forever and ever
You are God
You command the oceans
You ride on the heavens
You restore my soul
You are God
You are robed in brightness
You are pure and righteous
You restore my soul

You are God, faithful and holy
You are Lord, so full of glory
You are King, wonderful Father
Lord, You reign forever and ever

You are God You move mighty mountains
You rule kings and kingdoms You restore my soul

You are God
You resound like thunder
You are clothed in splendor
You restore my soul

(Jeff Deyo, Jeremy McCoy, Fred Williams)

3.       What is in a great worship song?

4.       Are there any worship songs that have impacted your spiritual life?

5.       God knows your heart at ALL times, He knows when you are fully worshipping with your heart and soul and when you are just playing music.

a.       Why, when we are leading, do our hearts have to be in it? 

b.      Why can’t we just play great worship and let the words and the music draw the congregation to God?

6.       How can we pray for you tonight?

Personal reflection – this question is just between you and God.

We know the right words to say about being leaders of worship but if God was answering on our behalf would He say that our hearts are truly worshiping Him?

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I always wanted to end our discussion time with prayer requests and praying for each other, nothing builds trust and community better than sharing the things that we want prayer for (unless you're still holding back on personal prayer requests).  And a "reflection" question.  This is meant to take this discussion to a deeper and more personal level.  It's also meant to help the kids develop a real relationship with Jesus.

Relationship with Jesus?  What can that mean?  I hadn't ever thought of my faith in this respect until about 5 or 6 years ago.  I was going through many of the motions but not truly thinking of Jesus as a friend, a personal confidant, but He is and that is something that helps me to truly worship with my heart - knowing that my words, whether spoken in a prayer or sung in a song, are speaking to my friend Jesus.  This is something that I want anyone who worships to realize, He is more than an invisible entity, He is real and He is listening.

Lastly, I have to mention the title of this series and this particular blog, The Heart of Worship.  Anyone who has been a Christian involved in church for the past 10 years has heard this song and I'm sure many have sung it, maybe even to the point where the words are no longer thought about but sung by rote. Well at the end of this discussion, I played Heart of Worship written by Matt Redman and just let the kids meditate on the words.  So simply stated, "When the music fades, and all is stripped away and I simply come.  Longing just to bring something that's of worth that will bless Your heart.  I'll bring you more than a song for a song in itself is not what You have required.  You search much deeper within throughout the way things appear.  You're looking into my heart.  I'm coming back to the Heart of Worship and it's ALL ABOUT YOU, ALL ABOUT YOU JESUS.  I'm sorry Lord for the thing I've made it when it's all about you, all about you Jesus!  I used the song as a punctuation mark for the discussion and immediately the kids stated that they wanted to do this song as part of their worship set and we did, unplugged and it was really a wonderful experience for me and I hope for them and most of all for God.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P-Zp586pvZgMatt Redman's Heart of Worship

Worship: Choir or Band?

I loved singing in church choir and I was so lucky that for several years, the churches I attended had huge great choirs.  The last choir even cut a CD and I got to be a part of that and it was awesome.  But when my husband and I met, we both needed to relocate and find a new church.  We went to a few that had choirs but for this reason or that, we didn't make them our home.  So I thought perhaps, I will start one and I tried, unfortunately it was unsuccesful as was the church.  The next church said, that it didn't fit their style and so did the next but I was determined so I tried asking again and instead, I was given the opportunity to start a youth worship band.  Not quite the same thing but I know God doesn't always put you in a situation that is of your desire and so my next blogs will explain what I have learned about worhsiping God through music.

RE-reading

I love this blogging thing! I rarely write is a journal anymore. It seems like life is rushing by at an alarming rate and I am holding on, once in a while I raise my arms and holler with delight but it seems as if I am mostly turning around to see where I have been. I just re-read a few of these old blogs and of course I know why I wrote them and how desperate I was feeling at the time. Time does heal wounds and God does speak to us, we just have to be listening.

When my son was younger, 6 or 7 years old, we had a half hour commute from school/work to home. During that time, he would talk and talk and talk, while I would be concentrating on driving, going over my work day and evening plans in my head, listening to the radio, etc.. Being a woman and able to multi-task, I would also be affirming everything he said with a "u-hum, ok, or yes," to make him believe that I was listening. One day, he called me out on it! "Mom, are you listening? What did I tell you?" Oops, he caught on and while he was telling me about whatever he was telling me about and I was pretending to listen, I missed something. I missed an opportunity to HEAR my child. Now he is 15 and when we talk, I listen, because what he has to say is important to me! I really think we tend to get this way with God. We nod, or affirm vocally while we are really busy doing something else and then we have the gall to wonder why God doesn't speak plainly to us. We aren't going to get a burning bush, and it isn't going to be written on a billboard, He's not going to shout in our face but He does listen and He does respond, quietly, inaudibly, and if we aren't listening with our hearts and our minds, we will miss it. And when God speaks, it's good stuff!

1 John 4:16
And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love, lives in God, and God in him.

God’s will

How do we know what God’s will is? Well, several people will say read the Bible, all the answers that you need are in there. But where do you begin? Go to someone who knows the Bible and seek their counsel but what if they don’t seem sure either? Wait, meditate, pray, fast……all this makes me want to scream! I just want results, I want answers, I want God to talk to me, not through a song or through my very spiritual masseuse; I want the burning bush. I want the booming voice of God to shout it in my face, but I know He won’t. That is not how God works. So I continue to pray for His will, I continue to be patient and listen for that quiet whisper that speaks to my soul and I wait and I wait……………